Saturday, November 14, 2009

Student Who Is Offended By Holidays?

I have one student who doesn't celebrate ANY holidays for religious reasons. The rest of my students really enjoy worksheets with holiday (non-religious) games or graphics and I find them an effective teaching tool to keep these students interests. For the one student who doesn't celebrate, I have made similar worksheets with "nature" themes or the like. Of course that creates extra work for me. If I can't, then I just give him undecorated worksheets or games that work on the same skills. He is still unhappy that the other students get holiday worksheets. How would you handle this situation. I want to be fair to everyone.

Student Who Is Offended By Holidays?
Sadly. this questioner demonstrates thinly-veiled religious intolerance.





While the purported teacher complains that providing non-religious worksheets is "extra work", she ignores the reality that it actually *IS* her job to provide worksheets that can be used by all her students.





It is NOT her job to require the use of religious worksheets that can only be used by adherents of particular religions. Even if she and her principal pretend that Santa has nothing to do with Christmas, and that Christmas has nothing to do with religion, that does not change the plain truth of the matter.





It might be best to remind this principal, this teacher, and parents and children that the best place to learn about religious holidays and religious subjects is with their families at their houses of worship, rather than at taxpayer-supported government-mandated secular educational institutions.





No matter what the school system and this educator choose to do about promoting religion in schools, Jehovah's Witnesses understand that they cannot expect perfect fairness from any human institution.





Learn more:


http://watchtower.org/e/19980708/


http://watchtower.org/e/20030301/article...


http://watchtower.org/e/19980601/


http://jw-media.org/vnr/5263723221/22812...
Reply:Thanks fr caring, hope all is well Report It

Reply:I hate to say this, but if you are in a public school you may need to just not do holiday related things as long as you have this child in your class. I have worked in Public schools for a long time and I know this child's parents are going to call your principal sooner or later. Stick to the seasons. Warn whoever is his teacher next year.
Reply:You say that this one feels that the rest should not have holiday worksheets. If the rest wish these, then that is not for him to say such things. If you were to give this one the holiday worksheets and force him to participate, then you would have a problem. Perhaps if you take it from that standpoint, you will be able to make your point.
Reply:I am assuming you teach a primary grade based on your use of worksheets. Most primary grades have holidays as one of their Social Studies content standards. That could be your way out. Also, I always speak with my JW parents at the beginning of the year about what I will be doing in my class. I provide choices for the child, but allow them to choose. I am not the religion police. If the child takes the holiday worksheet, that is his choice. If this child is unhappy with the choices you give him it is really too bad. You have made additional efforts to accommodate his beliefs, but you must also be thinking about the rest of your students too. Again, talk to the parents. My experience has always been that they are very understanding and don't want to infringe upon the rights of the other students. Don't agonize over it. Life is too short!
Reply:It's a tough situation for you but you can expect to see more of this as the world "shrinks" and we have more diverse populations in our classrooms.





Holiday sheets for primary students are almost expected of us and yet not all the students celebrate Christmas. I believe there should be a choice of worksheets for ALL students. If the JW student sees that other students are choosing the non-holiday themed sheets he might feel better about the fact that he shouldn't be working on holiday sheets.





When you get a chance, try to discuss the situation with the child's parents. If it's too late to put the suggestions in place for this year at least you'll know what to do the next time this happens. Be sure to share what you've learned with the student's teacher for next year and the rest of your teaching colleagues.





Is this student allowed to stay in the classroom when one of your students has a birthday celebration? (Assuming that parents send in treats for their children's birthdays they way they did in my school.)
Reply:As one of Jehovah's Witnesses myself, I greatly appreciate that you go out of your way to respect the Bible-based beliefs of your student. So does Jehovah God. --Matthew 10:42.





If you haven't already done so, I suggest that you contact your local congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses and request a copy of the brochure "Jehovah's Witnesses and Education". If your student is particularly young, he/she may simply need repeated counsel from the parents and congregation elders in order to develop a more mature point of view. I can tell you for a fact that the elders will be more than willing to work graciously with you on this matter.





I hope this helps.





P.S. I'm very sorry that some of the answers on this forum are hostile. Mildness and "deep" respect are the Biblical REQUIREMENTS (Achtung!) of defending one's faith. For what it's worth, I see no evidence of "oppressing this child" or "thinly veiled religious intolorance" in your actions.
Reply:I don't know that I would call it offended. Because he knows he is the only one who don't celebrate. This is where we need to stick together as a multi-diverse group. WE used to have mangers %26amp; welcome %26amp; recognize the menorah.Today all this is challanged.Including the plg of aliegence. The founders believed in God. They never said Jehova Allah %26amp; Buddah. Although they are just as ok as God. The founders said God. My kids had friends whose parents were conservative christian, well.. The kids couldn't belive in Santa and had to stay home on x-mas party day @ school. The 4 kids in that family secretly belived in santa amoung themselves.My point is children will ajust themselves to a solid path if put b4 them. The 4 kids were all liked by other kids %26amp; often given candy %26amp; inform. from other kids. Can this student be allowed in library or to help in office or another teacher while aquiring same skills as other kids??
Reply:You could have the student write a page in a 'Journal' or 'School Diary' (any suitable note book designed as one). Have him write something about his own traditions etc. You can have him do this whenever he can't do what the other students are doing. You could also ask his mother what he can and can't do to be sure.
Reply:I think you are doing the best you can. You are spending extra time to make him feel included without offending his beliefs. What more does he want?
Reply:What age? Come up with worksheets and games that are winter related instead holiday related for the entire class. Nobody can deny that winter exists. Skiing, snowmen, and such. They are non-religious and non-holiday.





I hate being "politically correct", but in this day and age, with all the lawsuit-happy people out there, you kind of need to in this situation.
Reply:Your student has the right to practice his religion, but for him to want others to practice his religion (in not using holiday worksheets) is infringing on THEIR rights. I think you've gone above and beyond to accommodate his religious beliefs and should leave it at that. If he's that passionate about other people not being able to enjoy holidays, he should either have his parents take it up with the school board or he should have his parents home-school him. It's probably too late in the year now, but for future reference, you could talk about what ALL holidays have in common. I did this with my students this year (I have a student who is JW as well), and we concluded that holidays bring families together. The students also observed that holidays around this time of year focus on helping others. During our discussion, I brought up WHY JWs don't celebrate holidays, and that seemed to make the student feel more comfortable about the whole thing.





As for your actual question- you ARE being fair to everyone. All of your students are receiving the same practice on the skills they need to know, and you're accommodating their individual needs by seeing to it that you don't force the concept of holidays onto that student.
Reply:This is a tough one. It doesn't seem right if the rest of the class enjoys the holiday themed worksheets for you to eliminate them for this one student. It is admirable that you do take the extra time trying not to offend him, but I don't understand why he is unhappy about the rest of the class getting the holiday games. Unless, of course, it makes him feel like an outsider, which can be tough. I wonder if it would be a good idea to kind of mix the winter theme, as billy suggested, with the holiday games, that way, just make sure the boy who doesn't celebrate gets a winter game. And I wouldn't make a big deal about the change, and maybe the rest of the class won't, either.
Reply:It is impossible to make everyone happy. That is not what you are paid to do as a teacher. As a teacher you are paid to educate. That is what you are doing so you should not worry about the rest. The child is trying to conform the rest of the class to please his own wants and views? That is insane. LOL It would be more insane for you to be swayed by him.





I think you should remind the child that one must keep an open mind about all things. To see things only from his own point of view would be terribly narrow minded of him.
Reply:I never really understood the need to have superflous stuff in class when I was in school. When ever Christmas or any such event was being Celebrated I just sat out with a book:). As to this class roomif you are truly not pshing these celebrations on the Student then there aint much you can do. I suggest you have a Parent Teacher conference and request a copy of one of our brochures that explains in detail what we believe. Talk with the parents. One simple solution is to save the superfluous stuff for the superfluous things ie save Christmas for the Christmas party. I hope everything works out.





One last thing. Be careful. When I was in 5th grade my teacher instructed all the students to do a report on thanksgiving. 2 of the students in class(my self and a friend) were Witnesses. While some kids painted turkeys. Others gave reports on how good food is and the like. My report was on the original thanksgiving and the political circumstances and the like. I gave a simple historical review. She proceded to yell at the other Witness boy for being rude in that he wrote he feels it wrong to celebrate thanksgiving and then a list of reasons why. She then gave me an F because my report was not like the others and was not Happy.





I assume you are nowhere near as bad a teacher as Ms Gaymon was at that point. I just wanted to ask that you please strive to not give in to that bad example and also to warn that in the course of holiday disscussions there will more than likely come a time when the student will want to dispell the Santa Claus story(depending on the grade you teach) and so on.
Reply:There are several Jehovah Witness students in the school I work at. It is tricky not just in the class room but at music where they sing Christmas songs and library where they might read a Christmas book. I called the parents and very nicely explained the problem. These parents for the most part, are well aware of the situation and will be glad to work with you. One mom brought in a booklet explaining what they believe and sat down with the class and talked about their beliefs. I also included a lesson on Kwanzaa and Hanuka so that the kids could learn all about different religions. She provided me with several activities that her child could do and had no problem with him sitting in the office or hallway during those times. If approached gently and with concern it shows the parents that you care and are willing to work with them to ensure that their child does not feel left out. Good Luck!
Reply:just leave that person alone and let them follow their religion
Reply:I would suggest contacting the parents and explaining how the child is having difficulty handling the differences in their paperwork and classroom activities regarding holiday issues. Perhaps they can give you some additional suggestions on how this might be handled to satisfy all concerned. They also can talk to their child and help the child to understand why they have certain beliefs and make the adjustments more tolerable to the child. Keep in mind that the important thing involved here is the education of the child. I imagine the child is frustrated. You also seem to be getting a little frustrated with this situation. Relax. I'm sure you are doing your best. Just stay in touch with parents whenever you have a particular problem with any student. That way at least they know you are trying to help their child and you have covered your bases.
Reply:I would (and did) give the student worksheets with the same skill practive without the holiday graphics. For craft activities, I related the craft to learning about other countries/cultures. More of a multicultural approach. And one of our state objectives is to learn about other cultures so it fit the state curriculum and explain to the parents that fact. Sometimes the child is unhappy because he wants to do the holiday themed worksheets and knows he is not allowed by his parents for religious reasons. This is a parent problem and they need to explain their reasons to the student again.


All you can do is comply with the parents wishes and let them do their job of explaining to the student more detailed that you could do.
Reply:By the letter of the law, what you're doing is oppressing this child. He has the right to come to school and not have his religious views put into question. He is being singled out every time you pass out a holiday themed worksheet, and that's against the law. You may not like it, but it's true. You may not even agree with it (I don't necessarily agree with it), but it's a law all teachers are expected to follow.





To be fair to everyone, you need to find the solution that doesn't offend anyone. Find a way to reach ALL of your students that doesn't put anyone on the offensive. It's more than possible to keep students engaged without bringing holidays into the equation. You just need to find the way that works for your class.





Good luck!
Reply:I really liked Debmen's, Kara Wing, GG and Elizabeth's answer (as well as a few others).





I have a great respect for Jehovah's Witnesses and their children and I also understand completely why the child feels the way he does regarding the holiday games, worksheets, graphics or the like.





The Witnesses of Jehovah aren't just concerned about the abscence or precense of "religious" connotations and or themes in regards to holiday activities and or projects, they are manily concerned with what the origion and or root of the holiday is. The reason for this is because the God they worship (Jehovah) does not want those that belong to him to partake in anything that stems from pagan beliefs, customs and or practices.





The facts are that many practices, customs and traditions that are done on the holidays stem from a pagan source. This is more than likey the reason as to why the Jehovah's Witness boy in your class feels the way he does or acts the way he does, and it could also be a result of the teaching and parenting done at his home and or within his religious community.





That being the case, I feel that YOU are to be COMMENDED in your caring as a teacher to not only research this matter further but also in that you try to make the child feel comfortable while in your class. In the same way that you obviously have great respect and concern for his beliefs, rights and feelings, the child should be helped to see that he should have the same respect and concern for the rights, felings and beliefs of his fellow classmates.





If he does not wish to participate in the activities or would rather have a worksheet that doesn't have holiday themes on it, that's one thing (and should be respected because it has to do with HIS religious beliefs), but to ask you to NOT allow this for the rest of the class who may or may not share his views would not be right.





From what I know, have learned and have seen, many parents of Jehovah's Witnesses children are very easy to talk with, are greatly concerned with their children's schooling and are very open and agreeable to helping teachers with questions they may have and or solutions to make for a healthy and happy classroom enviroment for all involved.





My suggestion would be that you actually meet with his parents, explain the situation, show them that you try to appease their son for the sake of his beliefs, how the child has expressed his unhappiness concerning the other children receiving holiday worksheets and perhaps they will be able to help their son to appreciate that other children have a right to their activities the same as he has a right to his.





The main thing is that he is refraining to partake in something that he feels is not okay by his God's standards and he should be able to find happiness in knowing that his God is pleased with him.





As for the other students, he should simply have allowance for letting God ultimately handle the situation concerning others not belonging to his particular faith (smile).





But again I say that as a teacher YOU are to be commended, as teachers with enough caring as you are demonstrating is now becoming a very rare thing in this world today.
Reply:Looks like the problem is not about "holidays" but about him feeling left out. Have you tried talking to him? Try to explain that while everyone respects and accepts him being different, they cannot change their costumes just to please him, it would be unfair. Just as he right to refuse religious holidays, they have the right to embrace them. That is the meaning of "fair".


Tell him that you make special sheets for him/her, but ask him plainly if he would like to receive the same worksheets as everybody else when you can't give him a specially decorated one. Tell him you will still try to do something different special for him/her whenever your time allows.


Also, the parents may have something to do with this. Ask him/her if you can send a note to his/her parents explaining your situation. Maybe then, with his parents approval, he would feel comfortable to accept the same sheets as everyone else.





Good Luck!
Reply:I also have a JW in my 3rd grade classroom. I have talked to the parents and discuss what they consider acceptable for thier child in regards to celebrations flag salute, songs, etc. Anyways, I really don't use worksheets very much. At our school site we use thinking maps and cooperative learning activities. These two techniques require much less in terms of worksheets and are more geared to student produced work, especially the thinking maps. This then requires less effort of designing worksheets and more creativity from the students. Also, if appropriate, you can have the student write about why it bothers them or journal thier thoughts. BTW...you are being fair to all, it would be unfair if you changed everything just to accomodate one childs beliefs. You are going above and beyond to accomodate them.


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